ending soon, one more day - dreadful school.
but i dont feel like going out, or being with anyone for tt matter. very broke as well.

i feel like spontaneous serendipity should take over - no pre-planned meetings, nothing organised. just for once, for my own plans to take root - be it to take a stroll at east coast at midnight (i dont quite care, i always hv a pocket knife with me), or for my body to detox itself (instead of stuffing myself full with food which i dont quite like in the first place just for company's sake) or to rot at home watching dvds and lounging about(instead of exposing myself to second-hand smoke or environmental pollution or to alcohol which might be a necessary accompaniment to induced-fun which is never real fun in the first place unlike good heartwarming conversations and flighty-flighty laughs and in the second, which is not a lot of fun when you know it does your liver harm. yucks)

this is as neurotic as it gets i guess. this might very well also be bordering on being obsessive-compulsive.

just gimme two weeks i guess for me to relax my body and my mind after, what - decades of education and forced socialising.